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Survivor
Zaji sets Ro Ro up with a boy; Bitch Puddin', Mace, and Ace take a spa day. Plot It's 8:27 A.M., and Ro Ro, Zaji, and Ariana are at Cloud City High in their first period choir class where Ro Ro is yearning for a boyfriend. "Girls," Ro Ro exclaims, "I want a boyfriend!" Zaji and Ariana look at each other and Zaji says, "Well, I don't exactly know anyone that's gay." "Well, what about your bisexual friend, Nate?" Ro Ro asks, to which Zaji almost snaps, saying, "No! Nobody can have Nate, like he is off limits!" Ro Ro and Ariana look around in embarrassment before being called by their choir teacher to participate in their warm-ups. Meanwhile, at Kahn Palace, Bitch Puddin' is just waking up and goes downstairs to the kitchen to see Jake's beautifully-made breakfast, and sees his extreme happiness as he washes dishes. "Good morning, B.P." Jake greets him, where he just grunts and pours a cup of coffee. "I already put sugar in the coffee, since we all mostly like the same amount of sugar in it." Jake continues. "No amount of sugar could make me happy." B.P. says. Mace overhears this as he floats into the kitchen to grab his breakfast and says, "Oh my Kahn, B.P., you are never happy." "You're never happy either," B.P. says, where Mace responds, "I'm not supposed to show extreme levels of emotions, it messes with Ace and I's powers." Ace floats up through a portal in the floor to detest his brother's statement. "What a load of bullshit, Mace. I show my anger all the time and I've been perfectly fine." Ace states, confidently. "First of all, Ace, it's messing with you now cause you're too stupid to remember that our powers' strength depends on our emotions," Mace says, "Not to mention the fact that you got so pissed off the other day at your S Box Two that you couldn't even fly!" "So that's what all those 'power walks' were about? When you told me that, I was surprised that you were actually physically exorcising." Jake says. "Shut the fuck up, Jake!" Ace exclaims, and his powers make a nearby vase in the hallway break, causing him to see his twin's point. Bitch Puddin' and Ace grab their plates and coffee and proceed to their respective rooms, while Mace decides to stay and eat at the bar in the kitchen to converse with Jake. "I don't understand what's happening to poor Ace. Of course Bitch Puddin's always mad, but I never thought Ace would, or could get like this." Jake says, drying his hands from the dish water. "I knew it could happen, it can happen to both of us, but I didn't calculate the possibility of it actually happening. I just know it's because of his irritation of Jamal's personality and existence." Mace says. "Yeah, I agree. Ever since Ro because infatuated with wanting to love Jamal and do whatever he could to make Jamal happy at the expense of his own happiness, Ace started to get worse and worse. B.P.'s situation isn't any better either, as Jamal's treatment of Ro Ro is really irking him." Jake responds. Flake and Froyo run into kitchen and bark at Jake in hopes of being let out, though he signals them to wait. "In all honesty, I don't have a problem with Jamal, though he could be a hell of a lot less of an asshole to Ro Ro and people in general, and less socially retarded. I swear, I can just see him being a serial killer and/or a rapist in his future, because one, he thinks he can get away with anything, two, he thinks he's smarter than everyone when there are thousands of people in Outworld alone that are extremely smarter than him, all of us being prime examples, and three, he's just plain creepy, and not the good type of creepy." Mace says, staring at his plate. Flove Lo, Fitch and Fae run in to join their siblings to express their need to be let out and Jake decides to let them out with their father, leaving Mace to think about what to do with his siblings' anger. Back at school, Ro Ro, Zaji, and Ariana are in their fourth period Realm Studies class where Ro Ro becomes somewhat hot and bothered and goes through Zaji's phone. "Ugh, Zaji," Ro Ro sighs, "How come you won't let me have Nate?" "'Cause Nate is just delicate, like I don't think you and him would work out because, I mean, he likes who he likes." Zaji says, shrugging her shoulders. "You mean there's literally no one else you know?" Ro Ro asks. Zaji thinks for a second and remembers her friend Curtis whom she met over the summer and gives Ro Ro his Snapchat and tells Curtis that she's going to hook him up with someone. "See, now you've got you a possible boyfriend." Ariana says. "Well I mean, I don't really know much about him. Is he a top?" Ro Ro asks. "I think he's both?" Zaji says, unsure of her answer. Ro Ro, though skeptical, decides to take the chance of texting Curtis in hopes of getting a boyfriend. The bell rings and Ro Ro is floating up the stairs to his English class. When he gets to Mr. Barr's door, he gets a text back from Curtis and he introduces himself as Zaji's friend. Throughout fifth period, Ro Ro continuously sneaks on his phone to text Curtis, as the two have hit it off and find that they have a lot in common with one another, with Ro Ro believing he may be The One. At the end of the school day, Ro Ro gets the idea to invite Curtis to his homecoming dance and later goes to his house to take him the guest invitation paper. At the palace, Bitch Puddin' is in the arena piling Tarkatan bodies, unleashing his full anger on their poor souls. Mace floats through the doors and swiftly prevents a soldier's body from hitting him by opening a portal in front of him. "Bitch Puddin', I have a suggestion for you on how I can make you a little less angry." Mace says, floating cautiously towards his enraged brother. "What is it?" Bitch Puddin' asks, angrily bashing in a soldier's skull on the throne's armrest with his tentacles. "I was thinking that maybe me, you and Ace could go to the spa today or something, you know to soothe our spirits?" Mace asks. Bitch Puddin' takes his cloak off, which removes his tentacles and exposes his legs, mounts a soldier's back by holding onto their shoulders and snapping their spine with his feet. He then launches his entire body through the soldier's chest, leaving a gaping hole while he holds their heart and says to Mace, "Don't you see I'm working my anger out?" "I was thinking maybe a more peaceful way?" Mace asks fearfully, watching as the soldier fails to make a last attempt at reaching for their heart. Bitch Puddin' sighs, snaps another soldier's neck sideways and says, "Come back and tell me what Ace says and I'll think about it. If he agrees to go I'll come along." Mace is surprised and flies upwards through a portal to his and Ace's rooms. When he gets there, he sees Ace stabbing a doll that's been shaped to look like Jamal. "Ace, I wanted to ask if you and Bitch Puddin' would like to go to the spa today to ease your angry spirits?" Mace asks. "You know what, I might as well." Ace responds, chopping the doll's neck off. Mace floats down in a portal back to the arena to tell Bitch Puddin' Ace's answer, and when he gets there he sees Bitch Puddin' summon a giant tentacle from below a soldier which splits them up the middle and makes a hand-puppet out of them. "So Ace said he's willing to go to the spa." Mace says. Bitch Puddin' rolls his four eyes and says, "I'd hoped that Ace would say 'No' so that way I could continue killing in peace. But whatever." B.P. summons two more tentacles to rip the puppet-soldier in half and leaves out with Mace. The three boys visit a local spa in the Oasis that's rumored to be the best spa in town. "Ahh, The Stressless Express, this is gonna be fun, boys." Mace says, letting out a relaxed sigh. "You're definitely correct." Bitch Puddin' says, smirking evilly. "Not that type of fun B.P." Ace says with a worried tone. The boys enter and register for Swedish massages with the manager, Lu Xi. "Hello everyone, I'm Lu Xi. I recognize you boys as apart of the royal family: Mace, Ace, and the infamous Bitch Puddin'," Lu Xi says, to which Bitch Puddin' responds, "You're damn right." The masseuses begin to massage the boys' backs, with Ace's being especially tense. "You have to relax, sir," the masseuse says, and Ace's extreme relaxation causes his back to melt in the masseuses hands, causing the masseuse to run in fear, and prompting Ace to ask, "Is this relaxed enough?" The boys move on to an acupuncture session and the masseuse explains the benefits of acupuncture. "The placement of the needles is to help the flow of chi through the body and balance you out," the masseuse says. "You're about to die..." Bitch Puddin' says, but the masseuse assures him that there's nothing to worry about. The masseuse places a needle into Bitch Puddin' left arm, causing him to jerk slightly and the nearby plant burns to a crisp. Believing it to be nothing, the masseuse continues to place needles in B.P., with several things in and outside the spa setting ablaze. Just as the masseuse places the last needle in B.P.'s neck, he sets on fire and runs around screaming, eventually being extinguished by Lu Xi. The boys' finally relax in a hot sauna and let off steam. "You were right, Mace, I really did need this," Ace says. "Good, I didn't want to become the most rational one out of the two of us," Mace says, causing himself and his brothers to laugh. "I gotta hand it to you, I really didn't think I'd have this much fun at a spa," Bitch Puddin' says. The boys begin to get tired and fall asleep in the sauna. An hour later, Bitch Puddin' wakes up in the completely clear sauna with Mace and Ace gone. "Guys?" Bitch Puddin' says, looking for his brothers. B.P. tries to open the door but discovers that it's locked and instead tries to create a portal but to no avail, learning that his powers aren't working after failing to create a tentacle to burst through the door. "What the fuck is going on here?" B.P. asks, continuously banging on the door. "I don't have my powers or my cloak..." B.P. thinks and decides to use his brute strength to burst the door down, and, after several attempts, succeeds. "Boss, he's escaped, initiating code red," one of the masseuses says, and a group of masseuses close in to attack Bitch Puddin'. "Where are my brothers?" B.P. yells as he physically battles the masseuses. "You'll never find them," another masseuse says before he 's thrown threw a wall. B.P. runs through the army while looking for his cloak until he finds Lu Xi in his office alone. "Hello, Bitch Puddin'," Lu Xi says with a smirk. "What did you do to me, and what did you do to my brothers?" Bitch Puddin' asks angrily. "I did what everyone else who has faced you failed to do: neutralized your powers," Lu Xi says, still smirking, "Your brothers are being held for testing as we try to find out how to rid them from the realm entirely." "You'll never succeed. I took down your army without my powers, you're nothing special," Bitch Puddin' says, becoming angrier. The two engage in battle and Lu Xi evades every one of Bitch Puddin's hits before attacking, commenting on how brute strength means nothing. One of Bitch Puddin's missed flying kicks knocks down a vase in Lu Xi's bookshelf which reveals a secret entrance. "Aha, I know where my brothers are being held," Bitch Puddin' says, then he tackles Lu Xi and throws him out the window and runs down the secret entrance to find Mace and Ace. Bitch Puddin' travels through an entire cave system before finding Mace and Ace unconscious, gagged, suspended, and chained together in a giant cave guarded by 6 other masseuses. "You Asian bastards are about to piss me the fuck off!" Bitch Puddin' exclaims and charges at the guards. After knocking out 4, Lu Xi comes down with the rest of the army who corner Bitch Puddin' on a wall. He feels a sticky substance reminiscent to xenomorph hive resin slide onto his arm, realizing that they're near the Oasis xenomorph hive, and uses all his strength to partially break the wall. "What the hell are you doing?" Lu Xi exclaims, to which Bitch Puddin' replies, "Showing you a real army!" The wall breaks and xenomorphs begin to flood the cave and attack Lu Xi's army. Grid Exo shows up and recognizes Bitch Puddin' and uses his acidic blood to break Mace and Ace's chains, with the fall causing them to wake up. Lu Xi runs back upstairs while his army is eviscerated and the boys chase him after retrieving their cloaks from the nearby lockers, giving Bitch Puddin' his tentacle powers back. The boys corner Lu Xi in the receptionist area and question him. "I've heard about the power the real live Yin & Yang possess and I looked forward to harnessing that power for myself. I also knew to subdue the powerful Bitch Puddin' in order to succeed with my plan," Lu Xi explains and reveals himself to be Dionne Tsung's cousin. "I just want to know how you took my powers away," Bitch Puddin' says angrily. "Your acupuncture needles were laced with a magic spell I learned from my uncle a long time ago that neutralizes a person's powers for a few hours. It can only be done by using the spell on something that can enter the bloodstream," Lu Xi says. The boys deem Lu Xi too dangerous to stay alive and B.P. shoots one of his tentacles through Lu Xi's head, killing him. The boys return to the palace to see Ro Ro sitting sideways on the throne and texting Curtis. "What'd you guys do today?" Ro Ro asks the worn out boys. "Let's just say the spa wasn't a good idea after all," Ace says tiredly as he, Mace, and Bitch Puddin' go to their rooms. Short: Cookin' with Dubs (Turkey Dinner) "Hello everyone, I'm Jalen Dubs! Today, we're going to learn how to make a turkey dinner and be a typical fat ass. First, preheat the oven to 325 degrees Fahrenheit, then, pull the neck and giblets out of the cavity. Throw the liver in the trash, because fuck that shit, and save the rest of the giblets for gravy. Dry the turkey with paper towels, then season inside and out with salt and pepper. Fill the turkey with aromatics like chopped onions, carrots, apples and herbs, then place breast-side up in a roasting pan and brush with melted butter. Tent with foil and roast for 2 hours (for a 10- to 12-pound turkey; add an extra 15 minutes per pound for larger birds). Remove the foil, baste with more melted butter and crank the oven to 425 degrees F. Roast for another hour or until the meat at the thigh registers 165 degrees F. Let it rest while you make the gravy. Voila, you now have a fine turkey for your fat ass!" Trivia * Curtis never appears